Problems

I'm here again.
This time just thinking about these strange parts of being yourself. The ones in which you get stuck between two realities.
It's not that I'm sad, I understand that it seems like I simply force myself to stay on a permanent misery state. I just, stay this way sometimes, but it will be over soon. It's just, a side effect for thinking too much about things.
I always liked to hear people's troubles. I don't know why exactly, but I like to help. I know in most cases there's not much I can do but, perhaps just having someone to hear you can make a difference. Makes me feel useful...
Sometimes I feel like I hunt sadness in those around me, like... waiting for something bad happens so I can be useful. I know this isn't true, just a harmless thought.
It's pretty good when people thank you, and you actually feel you deserve it, there are no words to describe it at the moment. But there's the other situation, the one in which you can't help at all. You can just sit there and listen to their troubles, you can't even talk a thing because... you simply don't know. Even though you might have past through a similar situation, even though you previously found the answer for that particular question, there isn't something you can do. You can ressurrect the past situation, you can feel all the pain again, but it's just helpless.
What hurts most is that, I can't help them.


You can't save them. For they must save themselves, just as you're the only one who can save yourself. You already do much by hearing them. Wanting to take all the suffering in their place is just not right, no matter if you could really take it or not. People have to take on the suffering, it makes them grow up, it's, perhaps, the best teacher life can give you. You can decide to take more classes or simply learn the lesson, it's up to you. It's important to have friends to help you when the real troubles happen, but it's also important to keep in mind that they are after all, humans like you and they have problems also. They will do what they can do in order to help you, but the problems are only really over when you face them. Also, I would seriously advise you not to run away and pretend it's over. Life has prepared several mechanisms to keep the action going. They can track your mind, no matter where you go, they will be there with you.


Fuckin' words...