At last... some sleep

I am, tired.
But, I've managed to fulfill my duties. "Heroic effort'' all the way...
I've thought about many things today. Most of which are kinda sad and shall come back again later, or sooner, it doesn't matter. But I kinda liked the party tonight, it looked, like the places I didn't feel at home at all, but it was nice and it didn't feel so awkward, like being stranded.
I am made of weird sensations I suppose, like getting adrenaline out of the blue, and going through pure despair out of thin air. But it's not all so sudden and random, there's something deep inside. I'm sure of it.
One thought that I liked today, was that there are people trying to make me summon my hatred, let it free and wreak havoc. They aren't going to use my most powerful triumph for their evil deeds. I shall use it, however I want to use it. They try to piss me off, I know it.
And there's the good people. Well, it's a bit of a contradiction, good people... but, I refer to those who, unconditionally seem to like to talk to me. I always hated the way some people liked me, especially my family. I can't give anything in return, it is not reciprocal. Not that I hate them, they are cool and all but, I just can't show that much... toward them, I DON'T feel it.
These are not new thoughts anyway, I've always felt bad for not feeling in the past, but it's not my fault. It took some time to realize it. But, strangely enough, I like the company of a few special people. Is it too weird? I dunno.
Well, I like company. It's good to have people along, those few special...
That was one of the factors that created this wish of getting my friends together, lighting some bonfire and just staying near it, chatting all night. While I slept somewhere near. Company.
That's what I want for now, it doesn't matter if it's to make me sleep, or to play games, or to watch movies, or walking somewhere, I just wanted company.
For now, that's it, can you join me, whatever you are?


I'm not going to give excuses, all I can say is that your story is in the making. And a dream report, as soon as I dream (probably this night).