Sign of Evil

So, let's start to deposit these things in here. Not like we are not going to need it anymore, it's just that it's better to keep it hidden in here for some time. And never is plenty of time, so it's better not to make these assumptions.
I wonder what the fuck has been happening around, it's been quite a while since I last felt this stranded. The day looks pretty, but it feels strange, like the world had lost it's will to continue.
I keep on listening to Sign of Evil, it seems to fit the whole situation perfectly.
He said I couldn't take my plan ahead because I would get very sad with the outcome, since I am not one who does those things. It feels strange... it's like, when people doubt that you can do something, you just get more propelled into doing it. But listening to him saying that was, weird. At the same time it gives more motivation to my plan, more anger toward being good and stupid, it makes me wonder if the outcome is really going to be fun. I shouldn't think much about that though. I've gotta focus on the plan and nothing else. Maybe that's what I was born to do.
This song makes me feel even more lethargic. But I don't want it to stop.
It makes me wish once again for disaster, some demonic or zombie invasion, I don't know, just something to change completely the way things are in this stupid world. Just like... in the movies...
Yesterday felt somewhat good, somewhat odd. I wish there was a girl willing to go for a walk now, through this empty city and under this dead sky. Is there anyone else who can see how dead this day looks?
I don't know exactly about the walking part, but my real hope is that something happens. Something that makes this whole mess have a reason, a bit of life into this day. I don't know, perhaps watching a fun movie, just walking around, talking, whatever she wants. At the end of the day, she would just play with my hair until I slept, and then she would just fade out, because she never existed anyway.
It's a bit ridiculous but I'm not giving a fuck about it. This is just the place where I'm going to lock the part of me that gives me trouble, since I can't trully destroy it. So it gets easier to follow the plan.


I didn't mean to hurt anyone...
I just wanted a place to stay in this world, somewhere mine...
But the rules have changed and slowly I've learned that everyone else was right, I understand that I wasn't exactly different. I was just hiding what made me look like everyone else. What kept me from being with them.
I sometimes think about telling my friends to go away, because I don't want them to see it, but I don't think that would work anyway. If they really want to stay, then stay...
Didn't want them to see me like this... but the rules have changed...
And I don't know...
Could you please stop me? Wherever you are, whoever you are...