Count your blessings

I face thee yet again.
Again and again and again.
And all I crafted while the sun shone turns to dust.
I have no words.

I can see your eyes.
The endless hunger feels like being was never an option.
You're there, among the passers-by.
You have no words.

And none of us has got what to say.
We're both to blame.
You thought our boats floated parted ways.
We have no words.

It ain't by fire.
The end creeps.
Unprecedentedly.

By ourselves.
The darkness hallowed.
Unfathomable.

D01122017

It's one of those times I'm roaming through the city. It's cloudy, not so dark though. It ain't reminiscent of night or of storms, just, darker than sunny. I walk towards somewhere I don't truly reckon, and in the way there's this tall man with a big knife. I face him and somehow I manage to pass through the situation this time. It seemed like a robber, but he's bleeding profusely through the side of his neck.
I managed to make that knife DELVE into the area between neck and shoulders. He won't be a problem.
Walking through the city again, I see a girl with a sword. She feels like a weird encounter, not a robber. But she dashes in my direction and despite not recalling her words, I know she wants me dead. I miraculously get to wound her, not sure if a mortal wound, but she is unable to follow me.
I start moving to a friend's house. I know I'm nearby and maybe I could meet him. At a distance I see some sort of barbeque party, his building now looks more like a house and there's people partying but I can't get there. Not sure why, it's like I can see them but at the same time I can't, for they aren't on my view range. I just, know they are somewhere. I try leaving without being noticed by the people nearby the other blocks.
From this point on, the memories show that I'm moving using my arms, as if my arms were stretched. I grab the floor and pull myself, making short dashes, beastly. I see a fence around me in an area I know I shouldn't be, and by standing there the spotlights are going to be upon me, I panic. This wasn't what I meant by leaving unnoticed. Pulling myself and jumping I leave the area, there's a big grass field between residential areas. I move on a stone road put above the grass.
Two guys appear before me, they speak fast. They're there mocking me, and perhaps they also want to take my things away. I try to avoid 'em, but soon her figure is made seen. Her sword slashes a torso deeply, making a surge of blood paint the stones and grass. I run.
The other guy seems to run after me, but he becomes irrelevant, I dodge holes on the ground while using my arms to move. There's a group of youngsters nearby, I get closer and start asking for help. She makes way through bodies. I don't know how many died, possibly not many. But my back meets the ground, and soon comes her.
A menacing presence, and this time I feel fear escalating through my thoughts. Amidst the screams and rampage, the blade misses me as I dodge sideways, kicking her right leg. The anticlimactic unfolding of events brings me courage and I grab her sword while throwing her body on the floor.
I urge the crowd to hit her, and they start to kick and stomp her. The sword then makes its way through her stomach. And there she finds her end.
I start moving home, always pulling my body in short dashes. The floor under me seems to change into newspapers. I see news passing in glimpses as if the ground had some sort of projection on it. As if time passed by while I moved, and ultimately, I see myself at a fence. All those youngsters are back.
They block my way, making a line parallel to the fence. They are happy though, and they want me to see someone. Feeling the blood running away from my face, I recognize the girl.
She's there, now wielding two swords. The arms open sideways, with the blades making her silhouette continuous and dreadful. I feel something.
In the blink of an eye, I realize it.
I move forward, and hug her. For some bizarre reason, it only feels right that we should be together. She seems glad, yet surprised. She hugs back.
The screen cuts to some sort of vignette. It's night.
A night at a house with a small door and a friendly couple inside. They seem to have animal traits, yet I recognize them as friends I know. We talk to them, and by we I mean the group of youngsters and her. We remain outside the door, which does not allow us to pass by walking. There's a baby being taken care by the woman, while the man works.
And under these cozy yet weird circumstances, I'm taken back.

Rose Berg

I feel like I've found the way to truly disconnect from reality.
It comes funnily, as a rise of interest into something that wasn't there before. And once you get the bait, the hook never lets you go.
It's one of those obsessions we generally get with new things. Just that it doesn't... get old. But other things start getting old. People start to look strange. Activities seem to get boring.
And when the bells ring, you're already knee-deep.
But are we knee-deep in the money?
Is it money we're looking for?
Is that the surge that drives our senses to senselessness?
We pay all attention to nothing.
And nothing pays us back.
I feel stranded but it's hard to say that people were actually right when they said the hunt is evil. For these papers and numbers were never the root of all evil. If there was ever evil, it had its horrific birth inside us.
And that, you can't eliminate.
I wonder... Why does that feel so wonderful?
It's bewildering, it's bedazzling.
And it slowly becomes all there is.
For maybe, when we get our senses, we see we prefered to be blind.
So it could be said that this is the real meaning of having a run for your money. In the end it will beat us, and we run straight into it. Like a moth to flames.
And they burn gold.
It possibly becomes so right after you feel like that's the best you can do. That comes after you're too frail to face the reality you're not actually good at nothing. And this way we can trace back to where it all started. But we ain't following that way. 
Our way, we're dead set into going big, or going down. And big means giving it to those that matter. And that is the biggest appraisal, for we won't be tracing back to where it started, to fix it. We are going to overwhelm the the sinking feeling by numbers and attention.
Is that the reality or is it what we see because we were told to see?
Reality was never that high on the score anyway.
And now I bid farewell.

No drives from this point on

I kind of think that everyone seems to be so certain of themselves. It's weird. How can they? And how come you talk to me about all these complaints and all of a sudden you seem to be sure? It that the norm? Am I the one who doesn't change or are you the ones who are bipolar?
Is it their words or is it my ears?
Was I born with this? Or were they?
It makes me cringe.
It makes me hate.
But I don't want to hate some of these people. I wanted things to be good. But maybe my threshold is broken. Good was something way past. And we didn't get ahold of it.
All this perfect imperfection yadda-yadda.
How can you be so full of yourself? If you are just as empty as anyone else?
We are all zeros in this count.
And I'm getting tired of emulating ones.


I guess I'm only good at this.
Well that's something you're good at, at least!
But what's the use of it?
Well, it serves for you to be good at!
Your ludicrous excuses of positiveness aren't being of much use.
But you were complaining of being good at nothing.
And...?
Now you are good at something. And something is eternities from nothing.
It just happens to be a something that has no utility.
So we'll make it become useful. Be so good at it that it looks like you're good at all else. But what they don't know, is that you're only doing the same thing. Except, it is being used in ways unimagined!
Idiotic again...


We'll program it.
Until the program defeats us.
And code do us part...

The council of lost

I am afraid I haven't yet found it...
I am concerned you haven't searched it.
I am disappointed we didn't try it.
I am certain there is no it.


Hm, hi.
Hello there.

Are you still here?
Wave your arms if you're there.

But I am here.
And where else would we be if you heard the voice?

I can't see it.
But... came you here to see if we were where you supposed we would? Or was it for something that had a real use?

Sorry. I just couldn't find it.
And who might you be, that we should know what do you call by it?

I came here for help.
As many have in the past. Yet you are more unknown than the ones that are gone.


It... just... doesn't... seem... to... be... around...
Repeat with me.
It... ain't... anywhere...

The council of blame

From where we started, I'd say we are going negative.
Negative spiralling, possibly.
Maybe a whole horizon back.
And the sun seems to be setting beautifully ahead there.
We watch.


I come to you to ask for help.
But what could we do now, that would be different from all that happened before?
Help was already given, and it wasn't useful.
Moreover, you brought cannons.

I brought cannons for it was our last beacon of hope.
And it failed. Your last resort failed.
Why should we spend any resources on a lost light?
You... brought... cannons...

I had to use all I could.
Yet you didn't use much of what you had before you had nothing else.
Our resources aren't unlimited.
Why cannons?

I wanted it to succeed.
And it didn't. Do we seem to be the least interested in success?
Do we look as entities eager to waste resources? You had it. Now we have it.
Cannons was freed.

Cannons did not work as expected.
MY DEAR BOY, YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS MALFUNCTIONING!
Stop blaming your misuse of resources on those who can't choose.
Cannons works his ways...


It seems to me like you've made a long string of mistakes...
It seems to you like mistakes have me longer...
But appearances aside, WE'RE BOUND TO EACH OTHER NOW.
I'LL MARK YOUR EVERY STEP, I'LL DEEPEN YOUR EVERY SHADOW.
I'LL BE YOUR COMPANY TO DEATH.
AND ONCE YOU'VE LOST IT ALL BUT ME, I'LL SWALLOW YOU WHOLE.

Brainstorm to GO, part 3

'Sup there, coming back to register a few ideas I got while driving home.
It's mostly related to gym battling, due to the fact that there should be some sort of reward for stronger or more dedicated players. I'm against the idea of allowing those to dominate the game, but a game has to be rewarding too, that balance is complicated.
The first possibility is assigning the position of Gym Leader. The first golden badge bearer to put a pokémon into a gym becomes its leader (I thought about making lvl 30+ a requirement, but I ain't sure about that part). The leader gets to be fought last and gets a huge bonus, something like doubling the monster's CP. Yeah, the Gym Leader is the Gym Leader, right? It's still beatable especially if you got a party taking down the gym, but it adds a little bit of a challenge.
Another rewarding aspect of a gym could be, getting stardust for taking it down. I thought about really small amounts of dust, like 10 for every fight won, or maybe one or two hundred after taking the gym down. It's few, but it's something. Also, for every attacking pokémon that gets defeated during the entire gym battle (from the first to the last defender), the trainers defending could get some stardust. Small amounts, but with a high daily limit, so that people have some motivation into defending lots of gyms with the strongest 'mons they got.
As for the legendary raids, I'm quite concerned about the long-term consequences of them as it stands today. Sure, it's fun, it's desperating, it's frantic, and expensive in some cases. But they don't seem to hold well if you look some months ahead. I agree that they should be damn hard to catch, it's nerve-wracking when you get a bad luck streak, but it's part of the game. The thing is, it seems a bit off getting armies of legendary birds, if you look into the game's lore. I'd suggest having the players only being able to bestow one of each, as in, you got an Articuno, wanna participate in an Articuno raid? Well, let that one go and try a new one. That makes them relatively unique, but brings the problem of raid scarcity over the table. Once people get their high IV birds, they won't help others in raids, and then those late to the party get squashed. Also, they should be allowed to defend gyms, but maybe with a limit of only one legendary per gym.
Ah, maybe raids could give some other recovery items aside from Revives... Potions are welcome...